Worrying about your girlfriend being pregnant is incredibly stressful. What are you supposed to do? What if you’re not together? There’s very little info on how you’re supposed to act or what you should do. We’ve put together some pointers for you
1) Have you had unprotected sex? Has contraception failed or been a bit iffy? Well, yes, she could be pregnant. Even if you’ve been a contraception champion (sorry to tell you this) they’re not 100% fail-safe and so, yes she could be pregnant
2) On TV you know someone’s pregnant because they have morning sickness or eat weird food (or whatever strange ideas the scriptwriters come up with). In reality these aren’t signs of pregnancy, just side effects that happen to some women, sometimes. Don’t obsess about looking for things that you think pregnant women do or don’t do; they’re all different and it’s more likely to be confusing than accurate
3) Talk to her. Whether you’re together or not, talk to her. With respect and in a way that means you both get to say what you need to say. This isn’t the time to sort out your eternal relationship, take this in small steps
4) No matter how scared you are, this is bigger for her. It just is. If she is pregnant then this isn’t just going to go away. It’s absolutely normal and correct to be scared, and you can be worried about what’s going to happen but also be there for her. You might know other men who turn their back and leave the girl to deal with this alone, don’t be that guy. Step up and be supportive
I don’t even know where to start. We’ve been through loads together but this is not what I wanted, we never talked about it
5) Ask her if she wants to take a test. Offer to get one for her. Offer to go with her. Ask her what she wants and respect her answer
6) If you’re not together and not on speaking terms then you need to try to build bridges. Even if this isn’t fair. Nobody wins if you’re arguing. We promise that you will come out with more respect for yourself and a better person if you have acted well throughout this. Take small steps to show her in everything you say and do that you’re taking this seriously. Separate any bad feelings about the two of you together from the job of dealing with a possibly pregnancy. Support her in getting a test done as soon as possible so you both know exactly where you stand
Take an honest look at what contraception you’ve been using. There are so many choices available to you, if you don’t trust your current method (or if you didn’t use any – we’re especially talking to you) you need to try something else. Worrying about pregnancy is stressful, taking ownership of your contraception saves you from it. Go to your doctor or health clinic – protecting people from unwanted pregnancies and STIs is what they’re about. They have all the info and all the options and will listen to what you have to say and talk to you with respect.
In the UK contraception is free. STI tests are free. Doctors appointments are free. Pregnancy tests at the doctors are free. Protecting yourself is an essential part of a good sex life so take advantage of this amazing service.