never mind. *runs away*
No, it’s not easy to figure out how to start a difficult conversation. Especially when you’re trying to break it to your parents that they’re about to be grandparents. If you’re looking for the magic words that will guarantee they react with overwhelming joy then, sorry to break it to you … those words don’t exist.
My parents are strongly Catholic. I thought they’d be awful with this but they were weirdly calm. They kept telling me that I’m their daughter and they’re here for me
Sometimes it feels impossible to figure out how to even begin such a big conversation but there are loads of ways to get going. We’ve got some ideas to help you get things started
1) Get a first sentence sorted. One that makes it clear you’re trying to have a serious talk and have something to tell them
‘I have something to tell you, can we talk?’
‘I have something to tell you and I’m worried about how you’ll react’
‘I need to talk to you and I need you to listen’
2) Be honest and clear. Don’t try to hide what you’re telling them, use the proper words like ‘pregnant’ rather than ‘in trouble’ so they’re not left utterly confused about what you’re telling them.
3) Timing is important but don’t keep putting it off because the time doesn’t seem right. Trust us, if you’re waiting for a cosmic sign that tells you that NOW is perfect then you’ll wait forever. But some times are better than others. Grandad’s 70th birthday party is not the right time but maybe a Saturday afternoon could be okay. Ideally give yourself enough time to tell them and then some time for talking, maybe an hour or so. Be reasonable but remember it’s more important to tell them than to try to get the timing exactly perfect.
4) Let them react. This will be a shock and people can act strangely when they’re shocked. Emotional, confused, scared, worried or angry reactions can all look and feel very similar when you’re on the receiving end. Try to be honest with them about how you’re feeling and about what you need. If you don’t know what you need, tell them that.
I put it off for months, pretending it wasn’t happening. I left it so long that I didn’t really have time to make proper choices
This talk needs to happen, soon. The sooner you start, the more options you are giving yourself. Don’t look too hard for magic tricks to get it done perfectly, just take a deep breath and get started. You can do this.